Rebecca Zung never set out to be the lawyer who goes toe-to-toe with high-conflict personalities. But today, tearing down manipulation tactics is her full-time gig. During the pandemic, she started sharing her tactical insights on YouTube, where her videos have now crossed over 20 million views. Since then, she’s sold thousands of copies of her course, SLAY Your Negotiation with a Narcissist.
But how did she become specialized in narcissism? What led her to become a leading expert on winning negotiations with narcissists? In this blog, we’ll break down Rebecca’s path and explore how to deploy non-verbal communication in difficult situations.
How did Rebecca become an expert on narcissism?
Rebecca was looking for a way to stop practicing law full-time. She wanted to launch digital courses to teach negotiation skills. So she started sharing YouTube videos on the topic. She’d cover things like “How to get a pay raise” or “Clothing colour psychology in negotiations.” But they didn’t gain any traction.
Five years ago, Rebecca merged her practice with two partners to branch out into other ventures. One of the ventures she went into ended up with a covert narcissist. It was the worst experience of Rebecca’s life—a complete nightmare. But it led to an epiphany.
She decided she wouldn’t let that toxic person affect her. But she didn’t know that person was a narcissist at the time. She just knew that she had to get herself out of that situation.
Then someone told her that this person was a covert narcissist. She started reading book after book and realized she could apply what she learned about narcissism to what she knew about negotiation.
She made one video about “How to negotiate with a narcissist” and suddenly had 650 views. She realized she was onto something.
Rebecca knew her story could help others
Rebecca didn’t know if she wanted to be known as “The Narcissist Queen.” But she did know she could help people with her story. So she decided to tell it. It was time to get over the blame and shame and be authentic and honest. She started telling people, “If it can happen to me, it can happen to anybody.”
Narcissists attach themselves to you because you have so much to give. They’re good at what they do. They know how to manipulate you. She started educating people on recognizing narcissistic behaviour while sharing her story. Rebecca is deeply motivated to help people break free from toxic relationships and help them negotiate their best lives. It all starts with creating leverage.
How to Gain Leverage in Difficult Situations
In any high-conflict dispute, mastering your strategy is the difference between winning and getting crushed. “Leverage” is the critical pillar of Rebecca’s signature negotiation framework – SLAY:
S: Develop a strategy
L: Create leverage
A: Anticipate and be two steps ahead
Y: Focus on you and your case
Leverage is focused on the diamond and co-level supply. Diamond-level supply is about how a narcissist looks to others (they strive for an impressive career, impressive friends, etc.). Co-level supply is achieved when a narcissist manipulates people.
You have to create a situation where the narcissist feels like their diamond-level supply will be threatened or exposed. It’s playing the long game. You present it in a way that makes them feel they only have two options: the one you want or the alternative, leaving them feeling exposed.
The goal is to get them to let go of the co-level supply and stop jerking you around. You have to build leverage strategically and methodically. Rebecca teaches people how to do this step by step in her course.
Silent Strategy: The Power of Body Language
While building your legal and strategic leverage is essential, how you present yourself in the room matters just as much. Narcissists thrive on emotional reactions – they feed on your visible frustration, anxiety, or anger to maintain control.
This is where mastering non-verbal communication becomes your secret weapon. By maintaining an unshakeable posture, controlling your micro-expressions, and utilizing deliberate silence, you project absolute psychological authority. When a narcissist realizes their usual manipulation tactics fail to trigger a physical response from you, their leverage evaporates, allowing you to quietly command the conversation and steer the deal on your terms.
Addressing Narcissists with Non-Verbal Communication to Steer the Deal
If you’re ready to stop reacting and start rocking your high-stakes interactions, you need the right tactical training. To help you control the room, manage your triggers, and project absolute psychological authority, get started with our Free Non-Verbal Communication course. It’s the perfect next step for refining your tone, decoding body language, and commanding total control in your most difficult conversations.
For more information, contact Negotiations Ninja today!