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Chris Hadnagy: Strategies to Influence People Ethically, Ep #250

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Chris Hadnagy is brilliant. He is a master at all of the tactics and strategies required to persuade and influence. In this episode of Negotiations Ninja, we talk about some of the concepts in his newest book, “Human Hacking: Win Friends, Influence People, and Leave Them Better Off for Having Met You.” If you’re ready to change the way you ethically negotiate, don’t miss this episode!


Outline of This Episode

  • [1:55] Learn about Chris Hadnagy
  • [2:39] The vulnerability of multinational organizations
  • [7:27] Chapter three: Nailing the approach
  • [13:42] Why you need to maintain your pretext
  • [15:46] Make them want to help you
  • [19:01] How to develop rapport quickly
  • [26:50] How to connect with Chris Hadnagy

The vulnerabilities of multinational organizations

Chris works with companies with 10,000, 50,000, or 100,000+ employees with a turnover ratio of 10%. One thousand people come and go a year. That’s 3–4 new people every single day. The majority of their employees may be perfectly trained. But those 3–4 new people haven’t been trained, right? That brings vulnerability.

Some companies don’t train, set up security perimeters, or have a place for people to report phishing emails. They use punishment and shame as part of their security awareness program. If you clicked on a phish, there’s a chance you’ll get fired. If you want a child to be obedient, would publicly shaming them make them complicit? No! It would never work. But companies consistently embarrass their employees, hoping they’ll learn. Chris’s goal is to change that mentality.

Chris’s plea: Choose to use these principles ethically

Chris has anyone that reads his book sign an agreement that they will not take the skills they’ve learned and use them maliciously. Why? The skills can be used to scam people. Chris wanted to make sure that you realize that there is power in these skills. And with power comes responsibility, right? You should use these skills to become a better boss, manager, parent, and team player. You enhance your team, your family, and make yourself better. You want to leave anyone you interact with “better off for having met you.”

How to “make them want to help you”

Chris defines “influence” as “The act of getting someone to want to do what you want them to do.” Chris notes that a lot of his work builds off the foundation of Cialdini’s six principles of influence, one of which is reciprocity.

Reciprocity is the idea that if you give someone something, they feel indebted to you and want to give you something in return. But the ask can’t be of greater value than what you gave. You can’t hold the door open for someone then ask for their password. If you hold the door open for someone, they’ll likely hold the next door open for you.

There will be times when you don’t win a negotiation, but using these principles gives you the best chance of not losing. The more principles of influence you use, the more opportunities you give them to tell you exactly what they need to decide in your favor. When they tell you that, it becomes their idea. It also develops rapport.

How else can you develop rapport? What are some other strategies that you can use to ethically influence? Chris shares some genius tactics in this episode of Negotiations Ninja—you have to listen to the whole thing.

Resources & People Mentioned

Connect with Chris Hadnagy

Connect With Mark

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